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Timothy 20:15

Tim Tebow deserves another shot. He should leave the country to take it.

Sometime last season a friend of mine asked me who I’d rather have as my quarterback, Robert Griffin III or Colin Kaepernick. Both QBs were in the midst of dumpster fire seasons and their careers seemed headed to, at best, back-up status over the next two or three seasons.

I thought about it and chose Griffin, mainly because he actually has the brainpower to go with the physical skill set to play the position, even though his ego won’t let him actually learn it. Kaepernick may just be too stupid to get any better. But, I told him then and I meant it, I would take Tim Tebow over both of them. I still would.

Tebow’s name brings name brings up a lot of emotions in people, mostly stupid ones. He either drives you crazy or you think he’s the greatest athlete that ever fit his man-parts inside an athletic supporter. But, you know, there’s a middle ground there. He could be a tremendous athlete and leader who needs a lot of work developing his professional quarterbacking skills.

Tebow showed back up in the news over the last couple of weeks, first when his request to join the NFL’s first veteran’s combine was rejected and last week when Chip Kelly of the Philadelphia Eagles called him in to work out for the team. Tebow showed up, put on his show, and was promptly escorted out of the stadium.

Now, there’s rumors that the Eagles still want to sign him but have to find a trade partner for third-string quarterback Matt Barkley and that sounds just as likely as anything. If Barkley can’t beat out Mark Sanchez then there’s not much use keeping him on the team when he could be the best Subway Sandwich Artist Newport Beach, California has ever known.

Kelly told the NFL Network that he was just doing his “homework” on Tebow.

“It’s getting an exposure to a player so that when you have to make a decision and say ‘Hey, what are we going to do now?’” Kelly said. “‘You say, I don’t know anything about these players. Let’s bring them in and work them out, and it may be too late at that point in time.’”

Tebow hasn’t played a meaningful NFL snap since 2011 and been out of football completely for the last two seasons. In an effort to make a comeback, he enlisted the help of professional quarterback coach Tom House. House has helped coach up Tom Brady, Drew Brees, Carson Palmer and Alex Smith so Tebow has been in good hands. According to House, he’s also made great strides.

“He (Tebow) went from being a little inaccurate and didn’t throw a whole lot of spirals, to throwing very accurate and real good at spinning the ball,” House told CBS Sports.

There are 32 teams in the National Football League and most of them keep three quarterbacks on the roster. That’s anywhere from 64-96 available quarterback jobs, not counting practice squad positions. The fact that Tim Tebow can’t find a job where he can work under an NFL quarterback coach is ridiculous. You’re telling me you’d rather have Sean Renfree than Tebow? Curits Painter? Jeff Tuel? Brandon Weedon is still in the NFL but Tebow isn’t? It’s ridiculous.

The main thing keeping Tebow out of the NFL is the circus he brings with him and, really, it isn’t his fault. People love him to death and hate him with everything that they are. He’s a polarizing figure and it’s not his fault. You’d think he was the first openly Christian athlete in sports history.

The circus wouldn’t cause a problem with a good team with an established quarterback like New England or Green Bay or New Orleans. And with the exception of time spent in Patriots training camp in 2013, Tebow hasn’t landed with those teams because they’re usually the ones that just keep a single back-up quarterback since they’ve got so much of their salary cap tied up in the starter.

Teams with less settled QB situations can’t afford to bring Tebow in because the trouble he’d cause with their stupid fanbase. If he was in Jacksonville right now the first multiple-interception game Blake Bortles had would bring out the Tebow brigade in force. They’d be putting up billboards, running ads in the paper and booing anyone not wearing John 3:16 on his eyeblack off the field.

So what’s the answer for Tebow? Canada. Tebow needs to get on board with a Canadian Football League team and learn how to play the position as an athletic pocket passer. He needs to continue developing his quarterback skills in a place where his wins and losses won’t really matter. And, yes, Canada. I’m saying your football doesn’t matter.

That is way too many players and what's that crazy yellow circle about?
That is way too many players and what’s that crazy yellow circle about?

You take the example of Warren Moon, who spent six years with the Edmonton Eskimoes and Doug Flutie who played for three different CFL teams before returning to the NFL in 1998. They couldn’t get a fair shake in the U.S. for whatever reason so they went north to various Canadian ice-covered hellscapes and perfected their football games there. There’s no reason the same thing can’t work for Tebow too. And if it does his next shot won’t be a comeback with the NFL. It will be a homecoming as the anointed and uncontested starter of an NFL franchise.

Written by Adam Greene

Adam Greene is a writer and photographer based out of East Tennessee. His work has appeared on Cracked.com, in USA Today, the Associated Press, the Chicago Cubs Vineline Magazine, AskMen.com and many other publications.

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