Just when I think I’ve filled my white board with figures, notebooks with charts and got all the information needed to crack the code of the 2018-19 NFL season, Week 5 comes along and chokes it out like a Russian UFC fighter. I would say it’s back to the drawing board for me, but considering I’ve covered the wall next to my computer with hieroglyphics, I’m out of writing space. I’ll just have to do all this math straight from my head, so let the dumpster fire commence with the Week 6 edition of the Friday Afternoon Quarterback.
If I were one to believe in omens, then my pick for the Thursday Night Football affair between the Philadelphia Eagles and New York Giants would be a pretty good one. As always, I toss the TNF pick out on Facebook and Twitter.
I like the Eagles (-2) to get back on track in a big way against a Giants team ready to pack it in. Eagles 34, Giants 13 #TNF #PHIvsNYG
— Adam Greene (@TheFirstMan) October 11, 2018
That’s right. I nailed the score EXACTLY. How can you do better than predicting the actual final score? I should just shut this whole thing down right now. But when have I ever quit while I was ahead?
Related: NFL Betting Guide | Week 6 Odds
Byes: Detroit Lions and New Orleans Saints
Sunday
Los Angeles Chargers at Cleveland Browns (+1, O/U: 45)
The only reason the Chargers can’t claim the worst coaching staff in the league is because no one’s been fired in Houston or Dallas yet. Give it a month. Browns 24, Chargers 23
Was Hue Jackson telling his team there are 2 seconds left in the game? 😂 pic.twitter.com/moCC7Bd5jq
— Big Cat (@BarstoolBigCat) October 7, 2018
Chicago Bears at Miami Dolphins (+3.5, O/U: 41.5)
There’s plenty like about the Bears right now and there’ s no reason to believe Khalil Mack won’t be all over Ryan Tannehill, but the Dolphins are surprisingly frisky at home. This one looks like a trap. Dolphins 20, Bears 17
Carolina Panthers at Washington Redskins (-1, O/U: 44.5)
I’m not as down on Alex Smith as my contemporaries, but pairing a guy like him with Jay Gruden is like mixing water with even wetter, watery water. Panthers 27, Redskins 20
When you use play action to dial up the big 2-yard checkdown on 2nd & 5, Alex “Leroy” Smith is your guy pic.twitter.com/CeTulIi8lk
— Warren Sharp (@SharpFootball) October 9, 2018
Indianapolis Colts at New York Jets (-2.5, O/U: 45)
This one is coming down as a battle between Andrew Luck and Sam Darnold and while Darnold may eventually prove to be a franchise quarterback, Wolverine is about to go berserk. Colts 33, Jets 20
Pittsburgh Steelers at Cincinnati Bengals (-2, O/U: 52.5)
Considering I opened this column taking not one, but four consecutive dogs, the joke’s probably on me here. In spite of all of human history telling me otherwise, I’m picking the Bengals to finally make Pittsburgh Dad eat his glasses. Bengals 30, Steelers 28
For his career, #Bengals QB Andy Dalton is 1-6 against the #Steelers in Cincinnati at Paul Brown Stadium. 115 of 200 (57.5%) passing for 1307 yards with 8 TDs and 5 INTs.
— Steelers Depot (@Steelersdepot) October 12, 2018
Tampa Bay Buccaneers at Atlanta Falcons (-3, O/U: 57.5)
Jameis Winston finally gets his first start of the 2018 season. Falcons 43, Buccaneers 40
Seattle Seahawks vs Oakland Raiders (+2.5, O/U: 48) at Wembley Stadium
The last time Jon Gruden was on an overseas plane ride, he got vertigo for a month and couldn’t get out of bed. If that happens again, this could start a 4-0 stretch for the Raiders. Raiders 24, Seahawks 20
Buffalo Bills at Houston Texans (-10, O/U: 41)
The Bills just keep finding a way to completely annihilate everyone’s suicide pool. This 10 points is a Nathan Peterman spread even though, barring a catastrophe, he won’t be taking a snap. Is there any reason to trust Bill O’Brien with a two-score cushion? Nope. Texans 26, Bills 17
Bill O'Brien and Jason Garrett trying to lose this game pic.twitter.com/S8RU5ovnIQ
— The Action Network (@ActionNetworkHQ) October 8, 2018
Arizona Cardinals at Minnesota Vikings (-10, O/U: 43)
You want to continue to improve your defensive issues, Vikings? The Cardinals are here to help. Vikings 38, Cardinals 16
Los Angeles Rams at Denver Broncos (+7, O/U: 52)
The Rams got their road scare in Seattle last week and still escaped victorious so they’ll be ready for this one. The 2018 version of Case Keenum is looking a whole lot like the 2016 version of Case Keenum. Rams 33, Broncos 13
Jacksonville Jaguars at Dallas Cowboys (+3, O/U: 40.5)
The Jaguars are coming off their worst defensive performance of the season against one of the league’s two best offenses (the Chiefs). Now they face one of its worst offenses. The only hope this Cowboys team has is if Jason Garrett retires during the anthem. Jaguars 23, Cowboys 16
https://twitter.com/Tylerwilbanks14/status/1049095060321705985
Baltimore Ravens at Tennessee Titans (+2.5, O/U: 41.5)
The Titans are complete garbage every other week. This isn’t one of those weeks. I still can’t make any sense of the Ravens this season so, frankly, that’s why I’m picking them. Ravens 23, Titans 20
Sunday Night
Kansas City Chiefs at New England Patriots (-3,5, O/U: 59.5)
I know it’s the Patriots. I know it’s in prime time, but I’m not picking against Patrick Mahomes and the Chiefs again until they give me a reason to. Chiefs 33, Patriots 24
https://twitter.com/FootballTweetsO/status/1048011334498111490
Monday Night
San Francisco 49ers at Green Bay Packers (-9.5, O/U: 46.5)
The 49ers are just the kind of squad a good head coach can put away with little effort, so expect Mike McCarthy’s playcalling to take this one down to the wire. Packers 27, 49ers 23
This week
Straight up: 1-0
Against the spread:1-0
Last week
Straight up: 6-9
Against the spread: 4-11
Season
Straight up: 41-35-2
Against the spread: 36-42
