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Black Monday Head Coach Body Count Part 2

Neville E. Guard-USA TODAY Sports

In Part One, we discussed the Black Monday head coaching shake ups with the Arizona Cardinals, the Chicago Bears and the Detroit Lions. We aren’t done yet, as Sunday night spelled doom for a couple of NFL head coaches whose time was long overdue.

You can read Part One by clicking here.

INDIANAPOLIS COLTS

The final whistle from the Colts’ 22-13 win over the Houston Texans was still echoing through the air when news hit that the team had fired head coach Chuck Pagano, at the very least a year too late.

“Chuck Pagano provided Colts fans with many exciting wins and memories as head coach of the Colts,” team owner Jim Irsay said in a statement. “Throughout his tenure in Indianapolis, he impacted the lives of the players he coached, those who he worked with in the organization and Colts fans across the globe.”

Pagano, of course, replaced Jim Caldwell who was fired by the Detroit Lions not even 24 hours later. It’s been a solid stream of worthlessness for Indianapolis since Tony Dungy retired in 2008.

Chris Ballard was just hired as the general manager last year and got stuck with Pagano. He’ll now have the opportunity to bring in his own head coach. As long as Andrew Luck is healthy and back on the field, this should be a hotly contested job. Luck missed the entire 2017 season with a shoulder injury.

Pagano opened his career with the Colts notching three consecutive 11-5 seasons, the first of which was aided by his then offensive coordinator Bruce Arians while Pagano was being treated for leukemia. It also happened to coincide with a healthy Andrew Luck. When Luck was off the table, so were the Colts. Pagano ended up suffering the same inglorious end as his predecessor Caldwell, who couldn’t win without Peyton Manning.

Hopefully, for the NFL’s sake, this will be Pagano’s last shot at a head coaching job. He could hang around the league for years as a position coach or even a defensive coordinator, but he would be far from my first choice.

OAKLAND RAIDERS

Raiders owner Mark Davis wasn’t hearing any excuses for an under-performing Raiders squad that many (including me) picked to go to the Super Bowl. After a 30-10 curb stomp at the hands of an Anthony Lynn-coached Los Angeles Chargers team, Jack Del Rio was asked to turn in his apron and flair-covered suspenders.

“We appreciate Jack’s effort in building the foundation of this team for the future,” Davis said in a statement. “Thank you to Jack, his wife, Linda, and his daughter, Aubrey, for their important contributions to the Raiders and our local community in Oakland. We wish them all the best.”

https://twitter.com/WillReeveJr/status/947649441409859584

Del Rio led the Raiders to one winning season (a 12-4 mark last year) in three tries. The team signed him to a four-year contract extension last off-season which they will now have to eat. All these should have been reasons to put up with the NFL retread for another season, but something made that impossible.

Whatever could it have been?

It turns out all that speculation of Jon Gruden returning to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers was completely unfounded, even though the former Super Bowl-winning coach was putting out feelers for possible assistants. Nope, Gruden apparently had his be-squinted eyes set squarely on a return to the Raiders.

The rumor out there is that Gruden will not only be offered the job, but perhaps even an ownership stake in the team. If you were wondering why Chucky would give up his cushy Monday Night Football gig, that probably answers that question for you right there.

Del Rio’s Oakland tenure wraps up after three seasons and a 25-23 record. He’s 93-94 as an NFL head coach, a winning percentage of .497. Can we please keep him out of the big boy chair now, NFL owners? Good God.

CINCINNATI BENGALS

The Bengals didn’t officially fire Marvin Lewis, but they didn’t have to. His contract was up and, as of today, the Cincinnati doesn’t have a head coach. What are they going to do?

Well, if I was a betting man, and I am, I’d guess that Marvin Lewis will come back to Cincinnati on a two-year deal. He’s expressed interest in returning since no one seems too keen on hiring him as a general manager and it’s just the kind of dumbass move Mike Brown would make to keep his team from ever accomplishing a damn thing.

Lewis, if he does retire, does it with an 0-7 record in the postseason and a 124-119 record as a head coach, all with the Bengals. Cincy finished 7-9 this season, but did knock the Baltimore Ravens out of the playoffs with a soul-crushing, last second 31-27 win at M&T Stadium Sunday.

The Bengals were circling the corpse of Jay Gruden if the Redskins fired him, but they (stupidly) didn’t. Hue Jackson (incredibly!) would have also been a candidate, but the Cleveland Browns did the most Cleveland Browns thing they could do and kept their 0-16 head coach.

SAFE COACHES

Vance Joseph, Denver Broncos

I never really thought Joseph would be fired but, hell, I didn’t see Del Rio getting canned either a couple of weeks ago. Monday, general manager John Elway announced that Joseph will be back after a 5-11 season. Still, expect plenty of staff shake ups. If the Broncos don’t significantly improve in 2018, he’s definitely out.

Jay Gruden, Washington Redskins

The irony here is there was no way Gruden was not going to be a head coach in 2018, even if the Redskins rightly fired him. The Bengals would have snatched him up immediately.

Dirk Koetter, Tampa Bay Buccaneers

A lot of people lost money on this bet. After a pathetic 5-11 season, Koetter will be back in 2018. After Ben McAdoo, Koetter was easily the odds-on favorite for weeks to be the next coach fired.

Hue Jackson, Cleveland Browns

According to reports, team owner Jimmy Haslam told new GM John Dorsey that there would be “no debate” that Jackson would return as the team’s head coach. That Jackson hadn’t “lost his magic.” This is why you’re the worst organization in sports, Browns.

To make a wager on any sport, go to the world famous Diamond Sportsbook by clicking here.

Written by Adam Greene

Adam Greene is a writer and photographer based out of East Tennessee. His work has appeared on Cracked.com, in USA Today, the Associated Press, the Chicago Cubs Vineline Magazine, AskMen.com and many other publications.

Black Monday Head Coach Body Count Part 1

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