For players not currently working on a potential playoff team, there’s still a postseason. A weak, kind of pathetic post season that’s lost a lot of its luster since it moved to Orlando, Fla., but it still counts. Yep, I’m talking about the NFL Pro Bowl, the most meaningless game in the history of sport. And that’s counting badminton and trampoline.
This year the Pro Bowl is going back to its conference rosters, with the AFC matching up with the NFC and forgoing the horrible draft format that gave retired players an excuse to march around the sidelines with a microphone while all their cocaine and hookers are getting cold in the hospitality room.
This year’s Pro Bowl will have a skills showdown Thursday, which will just give the players attending another day they can tear their ACL for nothing.
Here’s your roster and some players who got screwed out of an invite.
AFC Quarterbacks: Tom Brady (New England Patriots), Derek Carr (Oakland Raiders), Ben Roethlisberger (Pittsburgh Steelers)
Who got screwed? It’s hard to argue with that line up this season, but Andrew Luck (97.1) and Marcus Mariota (96.7) both have higher passer ratings than Carr or Roethlisberger this year. Luck has thrown more TDs than all of the quarterbacks I’ve mentioned here and they both have their teams in the playoff race, so you can’t claim that they were ignored for being on losing teams.
It's safe to say we will be well represented at the 2017 Pro Bowl.
📰 | https://t.co/HGTRQ7tPgx pic.twitter.com/pcYJhsr694
— Pittsburgh Steelers (@steelers) December 21, 2016
NFC Quarterbacks: Matt Ryan (Atlanta Falcons), Aaron Rodgers (Green Bay Packers), Dak Prescott (Dallas Cowboys)
Who got screwed? Drew Brees big time. Brees (103.0) has a higher passer rating than Rodgers (100.3), thrown for more yards (4,559) than anyone else in the NFL and more touchdowns too. With the way Rodgers started the season, getting in over Brees’ body of work in 2017 doesn’t make a lot of sense.
AFC Running Backs: Le’Veon Bell (Steelers), DeMarco Murray (Tennessee Titans), LeSean McCoy (Buffalo Bills)
Who got screwed? Nobody. This is the list and it’s as solid as it gets. Murray is the No. 2 rusher in the league, Bell is No. 3 and McCoy is No. 5.
NFC Running Backs: Ezekiel Elliott (Cowboys), David Johnson (Arizona Cardinals), Devonta Freeman (Falcons)
Who got screwed? Jordan Howard from the Chicago Bears. Howard (1,059) has more yards than Freeman (930) and just two fewer touchdowns. All on a team that makes it much harder to score touchdowns.
https://twitter.com/ESPNNFL/status/811392176819093504
AFC Wide Receivers: Antonio Brown (Steelers), Amari Cooper (Raiders), A.J. Green (Bengals), T..Y. Hilton (Indianapolis Colts)
Who got screwed? So many guys. Green has been hurt for weeks and, yes, before he went down he was having a fantastic season, but that doesn’t make him a Pro Bowler this season. Jarvis Landry, Demaryius Thomas and Emmanual Sanders all have better numbers than Green right now and, you know, might actually be healthy enough to play in the Pro Bowl.
NFC Wide Receivers: Julio Jones (Falcons), Odell Beckham Jr. (New York Giants), Mike Evans (Tampa Bay Buccaneers), Larry Fitzgerald (Arizona Cardinals)
Who got screwed? Again, so many people and this time there’s no “lighting it up before an injury” excuse. Sure, this might be Larry Fitzgerald’s last season and he’s having a great one. You know who’s having a better season? Brandin Cooks, Jordy Nelson and even Kenny Britt and he plays for the Los Angeles Rams, for God’s sake.
Take a look at @AaronRodgers12's top photos from his 2016 #ProBowl season (so far)!
📸: https://t.co/vWjh7OT22M#GoPackGo pic.twitter.com/unZtgmPOPr
— Green Bay Packers (@packers) December 21, 2016
AFC Tight Ends: Travis Kelce (Kansas City Chiefs), Delanie Walker (Titans)
Who got screwed? Nobody. This is a solid two picks and, frankly, considering neither of these teams will make the Super Bowl, it’s safe bet both guys will be there.
NFC Tight Ends: Greg Olsen (Carolina Panthers), Jordan Reed (Washington Redskins)
Who got screwed? Jimmy Graham and Kyle Rudolph both could make an argument. Graham has two fewer catches than Reed (69-61), but has more yards (816-646) and the same number of touchdowns (5). Rudolph has more catches (66) than Reed, yards (670-) and four touchdowns. Cameron Brate of the Buccaneers has 56 catches, 648 yards and seven touchdowns. All on potential playoff teams.
Fullbacks: Mike Tolbert (Panthers), Kyle Juszcyzyk (Baltimore Ravens)
Who got screwed? A tight end. There shouldn’t be a fullback voted into the Pro Bowl. They should add another tight end and let the coaches pick any fullback they want one for the game.
Our seven Pro Bowl selections lead the NFL. #ReturnToGreatness
Read: https://t.co/092mlCC0Po pic.twitter.com/OXF1LosE0W
— Oakland Raiders (@Raiders) December 21, 2016
AFC offensive linemen: Joe Thomas (Cleveland Browns), Donald Penn (Raiders, Taylor Lewan (Titans), Marshal Yanda (Ravens), Kelechi Osemele (Raiders), David DeCastro (Steelers)
Who got screwed? Nobody. This is a championship group that would wrap up the third wish of any offensive line coach in the NFL if he released a genie from a magic lamp. The first two wishes? Wings and beer.
NFC Offensive linemen: Tyrom Smith (Cowboys), Brandon Scherff (Redskins), T.J. Lang (Packers), Zack Martin (Cowboys), Trent Williams (Redskins), Jason Peters (Eagles) Travis Frederick (Cowboys), Alex Mack (Falcons)
Who got screwed? Again, nobody. This is an elite group and kind of jarring that so many of them come from the NFC East.
Legend. #ProBowl pic.twitter.com/77mjfeWVFW
— NFL (@NFL) December 21, 2016
Next: The Pro Bowl defense
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